To be human...

In an effort to relieve myself
of worries, I keep aside in a shelf
my thoughts, my doubts, my relationships;
I live life stress-free, with a smile on my lips.
When I see others tensed, confused,
bothering about petty things, I feel amused,
smug about being untouched by anything.
Any bothering thoughts I can fling
onto that convenient shelf of mine, where
unattended, neglected thoughts yearn for care.
They cry, they whine, they stare at my face...
I choose to look away at a happier place.
My casual attitude and a non serious guise
are simply blatant, brazen lies;

And perhaps I have lost a part of myself
that lies hidden on that convenient shelf...

Piling on thoughts day after day,
The shelf one day might give way,
Scattered, the forgotten thoughts would lay...
And I would find the part of me gone astray,
to finish the jigsaw puzzle of myself.

Then my frozen heart could melt
touched by all the emotions felt:
Not only joy, but also to shed a tear
I could be spontaneous without fear.
Then I could worry, I could cry
My emotions could explode, as I would try
to get a grip over my emotional self
I would be happy to be human myself.

Delhi, 21.11.05